The basis for spousal relationships is respect and love. Of course you probably already knew this. Most people realize that these things are very important within a good marriage. There are some other things that are important in your relationship as well if you want to keep it strong.
Remember when you were just married? If you have only been married a bit, then think about those first dates. Remember how you treated each other then. No doubt you respected and loved them, but you were thoughtful and kind as well.
Over time when we know someone a long time, we often start becoming more unkind over the years. You would think you would become kinder, but it often doesn't work that way. Sometimes you take your partner for granted, thinking that they are a permanent fixture.
When you went to the store or bank last, how did you speak to the people that you met? What words did you use and what kind of tone did you use with the people that you met? More than likely you were polite and kind. In fact, they probably really thought that you were a very kind person when you left.
What about the tone you use and words you choose to say to your spouse from time to time. How do you sound when you are upset and angry with your spouse? Would you ever talk like that to anyone else? If you don't think that you would, then you are taking advantage of your spouse and that needs to change.
This is easy to do with others who are close to you, like family and friends. If your conversations were recorded and you heard them later, no doubt you would be upset at how you really sound. You'd be afraid and embarrassed to speak like that to a person that you did not even know.
Relationships between spouses that are good should be kind. Sure, you will get angry sometimes. There may be times when you say things that you end up regretting later. You do work to keep this from happening all the time by thinking about how you would talk to others and whether you would speak to them in this way.
Another important factor in great relationships between spouses is thoughtfulness. While you no doubt love your spouse, after some time, you may not be showing it as much. You should definitely be working to be very thoughtful when it comes to your spouse.
When you first are married or you just start dating, you do thoughtful things like sending cards, buying flowers, or doing other thoughtful things. After awhile of being together, sometimes you stop doing these things. Surprising your spouse and taking time to be thoughtful can help you to make sure you have a great relationship with your spouse.
Your marriage isn't something that is concrete. Your spouse could be with someone else. You need to start bringing back the way you spoke and the thoughtful things you did in the past when you were trying to win over your spouse. It is important that you are both thoughtful and kind. Along with respect and love, you will be able to use this to build a relationship that is strong and long lasting.