Your Biggest Marriage Problems - How to Solve Them!

in Spouse

Yes, your biggest marriage problems can be solved! All you need is some loving guidance and some loving tenaciousness. I can give you the guidance, but the love and tenaciousness are up to you. Just don't lose heart and don't give up!

If you have been struggling with these problems for a long time you are probably anxious to get them out of the way so that you can move on into a loving and fun relationship.

However, solving marriage problems can be difficult without outside advice.

Of course you would like to be able to talk it out with your spouse, but there's the rub. For most couples, lack of communication usually causes most of their problems. Good communication is indispensable for a healthy marriage.

Have you ever wondered why some couples never seem to have these problems? It may seem that way, but I will guarantee you that all married couples have problems. What makes the difference is how they handle them, so others so you never see their problems. They have learned to eliminate them quickly and efficiently.

The Secret To Making Your Biggest Marriage Problems Worse!

Well, it's really no secret. It's easy to make your problems worse...just clam up and don't communicate (or worse yet, communicate in a hostile way).

Here's what usually happens. (Note: the "you" in this example can be you, your spouse or both):

  • You are doing your best to get your point across and you think you're doing a pretty good job. However, you are not listening to yourself. The tone of your voice and the way you look and move is demonstrating that you are angry with your spouse. Your spouse responds negatively.
  • So you get more upset. You accuse and criticize your spouse instead of explaining your concern in a calm and loving manner.
  • You are carrying on a conversation...but it is a one-way conversation. You talk and your spouse listens...and what you say hurts. Your spouse responds negatively.
  • You and/or your spouse get defensive. Once this happens everything goes to pot. If your spouse is getting defensive, perhaps you're getting too offensive.
  • You can cause your spouse to clam up. If your spouse doesn't want to talk, examine yourself to see if you come across harshly or offensively. You may be the cause.
If this describes you, your spouse, or both of you, do your best to correct the above and watch how things change.

3 Steps To Resolving Your Marriage Problems

Here are three quick steps for using good communication to resolve even your biggest marriage problems:

Step 1 - Preparation

Think about what the problem is and write it down so you can see it clearly. Remember, you will be talking to the one you married because you love and cherish him or her. Don't accuse or blame anyone, just tell your spouse how you feel and assure your spouse of your love.

When your spouse tells you how he or she feels, don't blame, just accept that your spouse feels that way. Real love will be compassionate and will desire to heal any hurt feelings.

Step 2 - Choose The Right Time To Talk

Talk ahead of time about a time you will talk about your problem. Make sure it is a time when you are both rested and feel your best. Avoid talking about these things when you are tired or just come home from work.

Step 3 - Remember Your Goals

Agree that you are trying to find solutions and not to argue. Once you understand how each other feels, write down some ways you can avoid repeating whatever it is that causes frustration or anger. Do all in love.

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Robert Woodward has 1 articles online

There is much more to solving problems than the above. To find more ways to solve your biggest marriage problems, go to Your Biggest Marriage Problems. Or, if you want a complete solution to your marriage problems, go to now!

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Your Biggest Marriage Problems - How to Solve Them!

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This article was published on 2010/03/27
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